Wednesday, June 29, 2005

Scuba Boy has stones, plus hilarious news flash!

Neal Boortz wonders the same thing about Scuba Boy that I do:
Leftist hero Ted Kennedy was pontificating yesterday about what Bush needed to say during his speech on Iraq last night. During his rant Kennedy comesout with this gem:

"This is a difficult and challenging profession. No one should come to it lightly. As it should be. People have to be held accountable, professionally, and the public is looking at it in terms of private lives, as well. Everything is fair game."

Everything is fair game? Fine, Senator. If people need to be held accountable in their private lives, when are you going to explain to us why wandering up and down that dark road on that July night in 1969 worrying about your political future. What was more important, your political life, or saving the life of that girl trapped in the car you managed to drive into the drink? You do know that Mary Jo was alive in that car for as much as two hours, don't you? Two hours to die while you're working on your cover-up. Accountable? Do you care to respond to the Mass. State Police Detective Lieutenant who said that you "killed that girl the same as if (you) put a gun to her head and pulled the trigger"? You belong in jail. Not in the U.S. Senate.
Libs who cheer and support Ted Kennedy should be ashamed of themselves.

In more light-hearted and typically hilarious fashion, the Goomba News Network had this "news" story about America's favorite drunk uncle:
WASHINGTON (Goomba News Network) -- Last night's Democratic Party response to President George W. Bush's speech on Iraq was at times uneven and incoherent. Senator Edward Kennedy (Traitor-MA) attempted to inspire the nation with a short presentation detailing the Democratic Party's plan for Iraq. Here are excerpts from Kennedy's speech:

"The Democratic Party is like a big SUV...or a whataya call it?... a Hummer. We've got lots of room in the back seat for Liberty and Freedom."

"There is room for all Iraqis in the big Democratic Party car. Some of them can sit
in the front and some of them can squeeze into the back seat with Liberty and Freedom and... Michael Moore"

Kennedy then fell into a fit of giggles.

"I'm going to drive that big Democratic Party car with Iraqis and Freedom and Justice and Liberty and Michael Moore and Barbara Boxer and Barama Osama and...America...and I'll drive over President Clinton's Bridge to the 21st Century."

Suddenly there were loud whispers from off camera and Kennedy seemed annoyed

"What? What? Don't worry, I can drive."

At this point, the screen went black for 11 seconds. Senator Joseph Biden (plagiarist-DE) then appeared to complete the national address.

This was the second embarrassment for the Democratic Party in one week. Last Sunday, Senator Robert Byrd (KKK-WV) compared Iraq to a big unruly German shepherd his family owned during his early years. He stated that his Uncle Clem had taken the dog to some people he knew who had a big farm in the country where the dog could run and be happy. Byrd then stated that he had the same plan for the people of Iraq.
The GNN also picked up on Teddy's inspiration quotation, fashioned in the mold of his brother John: "Ask not what your country can do for you. Just figure out how badly you can hurt your country so that it won't be Conservative any more."