Satire alert: Belgium to pick up France's slack
Bookmark The Nose on Your Face now, or I'll replace the whole blog with a single page that reads repeated "All work and no play makes Jonathan a dull boy" a la The Shining. From TNOYF:
Long resigned to their role as the “Garfunkel” of the international punchline community, Belgium has seen their stock rise sharply on the news of the recent French presidential election. Nicolas Sarkozy’s vocal pro-American stance, along with his large margin of victory, may shift the balance of French-bashing away from the traditional favorites; the French.
“I have to be honest with you, I’m not all that familiar with the Belgians,” said Punxsutawney, Pennsylvania resident James Dyer. “But I better get up to speed quickly; they certainly aren’t going to just mock themselves. This election is a wake-up call for many of us in the France-mocking community, and we ignore the will of the people at our own peril.”
Dyer went on to say that although he does not know a great deal about Belgians, he does have some generic taunts “that can be utilized until more specific ones can be crafted.”
Experts say that more than anything, this election was a referendum on the cliched French taunting that has become prevalent in recent years.
“The French have given us so much material for so long, that it became almost too easy to mock them,” said veteran Francophobe Jack O’Malley. “Surrender, crepes, effeminate males, the f***ing beret? Comedy gold. I think that many people, myself included, have become complacent, lazy. On another note, let me be the first to welcome the gay, John Ritter-adoring, waffle-vendors of Belgium into their new role. You’ll be hearing from us.”