Wednesday, December 07, 2005

Pearl Harbor Day

Today is Pearl Harbor Day, and the Crush Liberalism Objective World News Service (CLOWNS) discovered, through routine investigation and CBS authentic documents, that two high-profile politicians at the time that Pearl Harbor was attacked and the U.S. entered World War II...have descendants active on today's political scene!

Howard Dean's grandfather Mujahi Dean (a Republican):
It's clear that the FDR administration had its mind made up to attack Germany from the beginning. I mean, 'Hellooooooo?' Germany wasn't the country who attacked us...Japan was! I think it's a crying shame that the president is going to sacrifice over 500,000 American solders' lives in a European and Pacific quagmire that we have no chance of winning militarily!
John Kerry's grandfather, Kashen Kerry, also spoke then:
The last thing we need is to terrorize conquered French citizens. After all, the French army should be doing that, and they would be were they not still traumatized from the blitzkrieg ass-beating that the Germans put on them. I actually did support liberating France... before I didn't. But anyway, we don't expect a time line... but we do expect a 'line of time' for success. Did I mention I served in World War I?
There may be more, so we at CLOWNS will keep looking. Our public service promise to you, our loyal readers! :-)